Do You Know What I Mean?

WhoseLineCommunicating with people today reminds me of the “Do You Know What I Mean?” game played on the “Whose Line is it Anyway?” TV show.

In the game, the comedians use everyday phrases or words but change the inflections of their voices to give the phrase or word a different connotation. For instance, they’re told they are customers in a bakery and must use bakery or cooking terms in unique ways.

To that end, you’ll get comments such as, “I’ve been waiting for over an hour to get my dough, if you know what I mean.” Or “You have delicious buns here, if you know what I mean.” And based on their vocal tones, expressions, and actions, you can take what they say as inflammatory, sexual, or just plain silly.

But euphemisms are no longer just a silly game on a TV show. Rather, they have become our communications standard. But using euphemisms to express ourselves has created its own type of miscommunication, which still leads to anger and upset. For instance, what is really meant when someone says they’re having difficulties at work? Are they unable to understand the functions of their job? Or do they not get along with their bosses or co-workers? Why can’t they simply say, “I don’t know what my boss wants because he is unclear in his instructions.” Great, now we can commiserate with our friend and maybe offer some advice.

Or how about when your company decides they no longer need your services and you’re told your job has been downsized (as opposed to being supersized?), you’re being offered a career change (what if you like your career just as it is?), or you’re being let go (was someone holding your hand?). Why can’t they just say, “You’re being fired.” At least that would be honest. And if they would give you a reason why you’re being fired, it would be even more helpful. Then you could avoid making the same mistake with your next company.

Miscommunications abound because we no longer speak or write honestly. Instead, we find colorful ways to talk around the issue (whatever the issue is). Two of the most common times that we fail to communicate honestly with each other involve love and death. The two most important times of our lives and we can’t be honest with each other. It’s sad.

Yet, instead of telling someone we love them, we skirt the issue by saying things like, “You fulfill me,” or “You complete me.” (What part of you was missing?) Granted, sometimes euphemisms can help us express how much we love someone by enabling us to create poetic and figurative phrases and statements. But those same euphemisms can also be misconstrued and misunderstood if not accompanied by some plain talk.

The other time in our lives that we rarely speak plainly is when someone dies. Yes, dies. They don’t pass away, move on (where’d they go, Nebraska?), or find a better place (and if they did, why can’t we visit them?). People die. We need to stop pretending that death doesn’t happen. It does, and it’s all right. It’s part of life.

So, stop miscommunicating with everyone and tell people what you really mean. It can save you and them a lot of bad feelings and time. Because instead of spending time trying to fix the hurt caused by the original miscommunication, you could be spending time enjoying life.

(For more information on how improving your communications can improve your relationships, read the book, More from the Masters.) MFM 3D - DLS - 8pxls - 2

Interview with Bianca Gubalke

What a truly fascinating person. She has a very unique perspective on life, reincarnation, and the unity of all species.

ELLIS NELSON BOOKS

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Today I welcome Bianca Gulbalke to talk about her book, Born With Wings: The ImmortalLife of Piu Piu. Bianca is an award-winning screenplay writer and artist, a passionate gardener, teacher and metaphysics student.

I recently finished her incredible work of visionary fiction. It’s one of those rare books that starts off immediately in the spiritual realm. From start to finish, this is visionary fiction at its finest and most bold. Swept up in the tale of incarnation, life, struggle, and purpose we follow the beautifully drawn characters as the author weaves a wonderful tale. An injured gosling and a little girl come together in lush and magical South Africa. There’s a call from ancestors and a drive for purpose, and danger’s never far away. It’s a captivating tale, a journey of emotions through life, death, and rebirth.

Thank you for joining me, Bianca!

B. GulbalkeWhat were your first glimmers…

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Ascending Spiral Book Review

AsccendingspiralimageAscending Spiral by Bob Rich

Summary: Dr. Pip Lipkin has lived for 12,000 years, incarnated many times as man, woman, and even as species beyond our world and senses. But he’s here for a reason: to pay restitution for an ancient crime by working to save humanity from certain destruction. “Ascending Spiral” is a book that will take the reader to many different places and times, showing, ultimately, that our differences and divisions, even at their most devastating, are less important than our similarities.

Recommendation: Yes

Review: “Ascending Spiral” by Bob Rich is the book “Cloud Atlas” aspired to be but, unfortunately, never was.

“Ascending Spiral” takes you on a journey through the past and present of Dr. Pip Lipkin, a psychologist and counselor. In so doing, it gives you a view of the experiences and ways in which each of us develop and grow through our different lifetimes on Earth.

In each life we interact with many of the same souls repeatedly as we learn what the expression “an eye for an eye” really means. Throughout the book, Pip experiences love, hate, war, depression, incarceration, and slavery, all while searching for that one moment when enlightenment sparks an awareness in his soul. Each moment of awareness brings his soul more light and a greater ability in making love-filled choices instead of fear-based ones.

Once I stepped beyond the prologue and into the actual story, I was hooked. The characters were vibrant and as alive as you and me. With every choice made, and every battle fought, I was on the edge of my seat wanting to know what would happen next.

Even if you don’t believe in reincarnation or past lives, you can enjoy this book by simply looking at it as an historical adventure novel. I found that the historical accuracy combined with the great pacing made for an entertaining read. The only time the pacing bogged down (for me) was toward the end when the story popped back into (almost) current time. What I mean by that is, we joined with Pip as young adult in university. However, soon after we jumped back to Pip as a child. I became a little confused with the story here, because of the age hopping, but once we got back to Pip as a young man, the story smoothed out again.

Overall, this is an excellent adventure for those who just want a good story; an extremely thought-provoking book for those contemplating the bigger question of “why are we here;” or a wonderful book for those wishing to explore the idea of past lives and reincarnation.

Bring Dying Into the Light

psychopomp-3d-dls-8pxls-2We need to stop being so afraid of death and dying that we can’t even talk to each other about it. Tip-toeing around the subject will not make it go away. It is part of the cycle of life.

To hear more about why we need to rethink the way we handle discussions with those facing imminent death and those left behind, watch this video:

Mastering Meditation–Now in Paperback

I’m proud to announce that my Mastering Meditation book is now available in paperback. Because the images included in the book are (to me, anyway) important, the book will be printed in color. While this does push the price a bit higher, I believe it is worth it.

Take a look, just go to Amazon.com for your copy.

 

Our Crazy Language

letters-flying-into-dictionary-pagesDid you ever wonder about the derivations of some of our words and why they’re spelled the way they are? This article explains the reasoning behind the spelling of some of our words, such as light, bright, and neighbor.

What’s with the ‘gh’ ?

Marketing With Book Trailers

Past Rekindled Book Trailer
Sample of book trailer slide

Book trailers are a wonderful way to help you market yourself and your books. They are great for those who do speaking tours, as you can run them before and after the speech, which helps to get the audience into the spirit of your topic. And when it comes to book fairs or conventions, they are especially useful. Running one or more book trailers at your booth or table, attracts people’s attention and makes them come over to see what’s happening.

[To read more…]